no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
