Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
