new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
