Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
