If that was your dad, he is hot
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize