Whod you bang
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
