she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize