Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
