just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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