U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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