I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
