we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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