like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
