I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
