There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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