I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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