just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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