Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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