I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
