This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
