When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
