I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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