woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Oh god it's open bar.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize