you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
