How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize