Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
NoShamevember. You game?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
