All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
