Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I just want to make out with him forever
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
