that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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