Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
