stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize
