I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
