the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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