In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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