i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
