I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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