We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
