Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
