I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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