Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
