Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We had to coat check the pizza.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
