3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
