Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
