Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I need to align my fucking chakras
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
