I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize