K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
