like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
