My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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