He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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