Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
